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Finding Your Peace With What You Can’t Change

Being At Peace With What You Can’t Change Creates Contentment

What can you do when something is frustrating, yet you know it cannot be changed? Accepting these things is much easier said than done. However, there are some steps you can take to work toward being at peace with what you cannot change. Once you are able to reach this state, you'll be much closer to achieving the contentment you seek. Follow these tips to get started.

Be Mindful

Mindfulness is a buzzword you are probably hearing a lot about lately. You might think it is hokey or some sort of fad, but all this concept really entails is paying attention to the present moment. With so many things competing for our attention and countless obligations on our plates, it can be hard to appreciate the here and now. Practice mindfulness by focusing on what you are doing every minute of the day. When your mind starts to wander, simply bring it back to the present activity. Enjoying, or at least paying attention to, what is right in front of you will help you to accept things more readily you cannot change. This is also a technique to be more productive and complete your work much quicker.

Consider the Big Picture

When you find yourself getting frustrated or angry about things you can't change, it will almost always help to gain perspective if you ask yourself whether this problem will matter in the long run. For instance, things like getting stuck in a slow grocery line or not being able to go swimming due to rain usually will not affect your future much.

Face Your Demons

Sometimes you are unhappy and feeling stuck due to things in your past that have caused you pain or regret. You may have dragged this baggage around for a long time, allowing it to accumulate and to control you more and more as each year passes. You can't change the past, but you can confront it. Take some time to get real and to be brutally honest with yourself. Acknowledge your mistakes and regrets, face your demons head-on and then let them go. Release them and move forward with a clean slate. This clear conscience will give you the fresh start you need to work toward being content.

Embrace Acceptance

Acceptance is probably the most difficult thing when it comes to moving past a complaint mindset. It's also the most impactful. As with facing your demons and acknowledging your baggage, learning to accept things involves letting go. Giving up control is scary, but it's a most necessary part of this whole process. Accepting your faults and the faults of others, factors you can't change, and your current situation will help you cope with your frustrations in order to move past them more effectively.

Many things are simply out of our control and cannot be changed. Finding ways to deal with this fact of life is key to your contentment. I hope these tips will help you as you work to reach the level of peace for which you strive.


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  • So much we can’t change but I’ve found we must move on and just hope for the best.

  • I have had more trauma this year than most other years. Yet acceptance and grace have been my go-to remedies for a well lived life! Great Blog!!

    Kate Loving Shenk
  • After living from one trauma to the next and maintaining a great attitude was huge in my success. Thank you for your insight.

    Carol Graham
  • Acceptance is big. Mindfullness is big. I had an experience of this with my aging mother and acceptance made it so much easier and lighter. Thanks again for holding this up to yet another light…. wait is there going to be EVEN MORE in the days to come??!

    Kathleen Port
  • Change indeed is something that is not always easy to live with but is a key factor in living a life of contentment and happiness. Beautifully written :)

    Pam Langord

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