Sometimes it is as Difficult as Letting Go
Learning to Let Go So You Can Find Contentment
Our complaints are based in several thoughts and feelings. Letting go of the ones that do not serve us well will not only help to lessen complaining, it can put you on the path toward truly feeling content. To remove these toxic beliefs, ideas and emotions, we first need to know what they are. Let's take a look at some of the things you can learn to let go of in order to find contentment in your life.
Guilt
Letting go of guilt involves removing the "should" from your life. We all have a list of "should" that we tell ourselves every day. These are obligations or standards we hold ourselves to or others hold us to that do not make us happy. There can be a lot of reasons why these things do not fill us up emotionally or make us feel satisfied. Usually, the basis of these reasons lies in the fact that the obligations are not congruent with our values, do not serve us well or are simply things we don't truly want for ourselves. Introspection and brutal honesty are needed to examine the source of guilt and to let it go from your life, but it can be done.
Expectations
Expectations are another thing you might want to let go of if you truly wish to be content. Expectations are different than standards. It is good to set the bar for the kind of treatment you'll accept from others and to reach for the stars when it comes to setting your goals. Expectations are another story because they involve what you expect from others and from things that are outside your control. When the things you expect do not occur, it can be incredibly disappointing. Letting go of unrealistic expectations can be quite freeing. The only person you can control is yourself. Instead of placing expectations on those around you and on factors outside of your control, emphasize your own reactions and behavior about these things.
Fear
There are a lot of things to fear in life. Many are legitimate in that these fears could pose a danger to your health of safety. However, a good number of your fears are things that truly cannot hurt you in the long run. Fear of failure is a quite common theme that holds lots of us back from becoming genuinely happy. It is scary to go after your dreams or goals because the consequences of failing can be quite traumatic. Other kinds of fear might be holding you back, as well. I recommend making a list of what you are afraid of and then brainstorming whether these fears are legitimate dangers or if they are simply things that seem too intimidating to face. Then delve deeper to examine what is holding you back from working to overcome the illegitimate fears. You might be surprised at your results, and chances are good you will emerge with some ideas of how to move past the irrational fears.
Worry
Needless worry is a stealer of joy. Yet so many of us fall prey to it. Some concern for what is going on in our lives is necessary and healthy, but far too often we find ourselves going down the rabbit hole of endless fixation on things we cannot control. Worrying needlessly about the future takes away the kinds of things you could be doing in the present to make your life better. Fixating on past regret is another form of worry that often consumes people. Trying to eliminate unnecessary dread from your life will help you along your path to contentment.
Take time each day to eliminate these things from your day to day. Letting go of feelings and emotions that are toxic and unproductive can go far toward becoming content.
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Martha – You are so right Martha, I have experienced that also and it is difficult to deal with, I think from both sides. Because there is some kind of need driving the behavior to make people feel guilty, but it is wrong no matter what.
Dominique Walton Brooks – Guilt is a tricky one, I struggle with it also. You are so welcome!
There are also those who try to play the guilt trip on others making it feel like it’s your fault. Been there and while letting go is hard and painful it’s needed to be content.
More great tips on achieving contentment. Guilt is something I have to work on! Thanks for sharing!